You again Movie Review – Never again…

You Again has to be one of the single most useless comedies of the whole year if not even longer. It’s mesmerizing how a single movie could squeeze so much shit into a mere 100 minutes. That’s what I call an accomplishment.

The worst part about this whole disaster is that the movie as usual had some potential with its premise: You Again is about Marni (Kristen Bell), an ugly girl that got her big share of ugly bullying in high school by the princess bitch Joanna, only to discover eight years later, that said bitch now is about to marry her brother. Of course, the now uber successful and beautiful Marni (a.k.a. Miss Formerly Ugly) tries anything to prevent the marriage of her brother and Joanna (a.k.a. Miss Marry Bitch). Her mother (Jamie Lee Curtis) also has her own share of problems with her former best friend (Sigourney Weaver).

Sigh. I know that (romantic) comedies don’t put high value in things like good written characters or dialogue. The goal’s usually to deliver some brainless fun for the masses, accompanied by some pathetic solemn scenes at the end. So good writing isn’t usually part of the deal. Yet everything at the beginning, the middle and end of You again feels so ridiculous even for a comedy that the word “shit” doesn’t even come close to the truth out there. I almost died from all this cliché ridden crap.

The worst part of You Again (unchallenged by anything else) is the characterization of Miss Marry Bitch. As far as I understand it, the girl was once uber evil in high school, only to become an angel later on. And although she absolutely loathes her former self, she immediately reverts back to her old uber evil bitchy way in front of the one girl whose life she turned into hell. Just to be sure you got it: She acts the exact way she now loathes completely and utterly.

…*inhale*…

WHHHHAAAAAAAAAAATTTTT!!!!! THEEEE!!!! FUUUUUUUUUUUCKKKK!!!!!!!!!

I heard legends of woman going bat-shit insane and changing their attitude every ten seconds, but even compared to that, the stunt of You Again is ridiculous. What’s worse is that basically an honest “I’m sorry” to Miss Formerly Ugly would have solved the whole problem. Yeah, of course, this doesn’t happen because of The Drama and that otherwise I wouldn’t have wasted 80 minutes of my life.

The “drama” surrounding the mothers is equally bad because here we get two older and truly grown-up parents that still bitch around because of some shit that happened twenty years ago. While I can understand that Miss Formerly Ugly has some deep scars and feels it is payback time, the same cannot be said about the mothers. Their “problem” is so silly that they should’ve spoken out on it ten minutes after they met. But no, the writer again had to beat around the bush and so we learn at the end that *dramatic music cues in* Sigourney Weaver’s character had some inferiority complex all her life. But that doesn’t prevent both mothers to reconcile after a fast five minute chat.

The reconciliation between Miss Marry Bitch and Miss Formerly Ugly is even worse. It’s some of the shittiest writing I had to endure since a long time. To describe that dialogue as total crap would be an insult to the usual crap out there. (But it’s still easily topped by that craptastic characterization of Miss Marry Bitch).

On the grander scheme of things You Again of course follows the worn out romantic comedy routine by the letter, so the marriage thing – which as usual is as extravagant as possible –of course ends up in a disaster. And of course everything ends up happily ever some minutes later, after Miss Formerly Ugly talks her brother back into marriage. In three sentences!!! The last one of those three is “You know you love her”.

And of course, the true marriage at the end of You Again isn’t some extravagant shit but takes place in a hospital, accompanied by Bambi the family dog! I was so glad the movie ended seconds later because otherwise I would’ve jumped into the silver screen to kill them all.

Conclusion

May this movie be blessed with every Golden Raspberry this year has to offer!

(And no, this post really has no movie stills in it because it would’ve meant that I had to do more work for that truly craptastic movie.)

Rating
Shit on an epic level. I feel sorry for the talents wasted here.

Comments

  • James

    I agree. Miss Marry Bitch… was such a bitch… It would of been better if they didnt get married… Like seriously… Everybody was looking down on Kristens Character for being mean… but really its nothing compared to what Miss Marry Bitch did… and thing this is she was doing it throughout the movie too. So she deserved it.. The only good part, was Kristens love interest scenes in which had some chemistry. As well as the ending betty white scene.
    And while i thought the dance by miss marry bitch was hot.. it just was weird.. too. I don;t know, if my wife did something like that i’d think thats a bit odd. Anyway Great review !

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