Shoot ‘Em Up Review

by Gunther Heinrich, 8 Aug 2010 in Reviews

You see a face of a man in close-up, hard, rough, and roughly lit. Music stemming from a Spaghetti Western plays its dramatic tunes. The atmosphere is heavy. Then, the guy begins to eat a carrot. He’s sitting on a bench, nothing happens.

Seconds later a pregnant woman runs past him, pain shows in her face, she’s screaming…and a mobster is on her trails, screaming “You’re dead, bitch”. She runs into a building, the mobster’s right behind her, getting ready to shoot her. Our unnamed guy watches the whole scene in front of him. After both are out of sight he mumbles “Fuck it all” and goes after them.

Just before the mobster can kill the damsel in distress our unnamed guy closes in. He turns the bad guy around, puts his carrot into the open mouth of the mobster and smashes it right through the neck. His last advice? “Eat your vegetables”.

This, ladies and gentlemen, are the very first two minutes of Shoot ‘Em Up.

One minute later the death toll already reaches eight.

If it’s a Klingon: Always Knock…

by Gunther Heinrich, 2 Jul 2010 in Fun

This one’s just a quickie, but the stop motion video “I am Beatiful” by Joshua and Nathan Flynn is too good to be left alone. Here’s the short video:

I always knew that Klingons have a softer side to them – but not that soft. I pity the red shirt for being too stupid to not knock at the door of a Klingon. Hello? You never enter the room of a Klingon without knocking first and running second.

Stupid red shirts…*grumble*

Andbyohtheway: I love the the animation here which is superb in my eyes. From start to finish. I especially love the moment when the Klingon (Worf??) goes into high pitch mode and starts to “wiggle” his whole body. Comedy

How to cut a Cake the Hilarious Way

by Gunther Heinrich, 12 Mar 2010 in Anime Fun

She snaps…she literally snaps…

Thank god for YouTube’s recommendations because otherwise I probably wouldn’t have found this extremely funny scene  from the anime Sayonara Zetsubou-Sensei (Farewell, Mr. Despair).

As the title suggests, the series is about a teacher who often is trying to kill himself (or on the verge of being absolutely in despair) and his group of eccentric female students.

She snaps…she literally snaps…

Now, if you wonder how eccentric they are: this scene shows you what happens when someone who is extremely fixated to do everything perfectly prepares to cut a cake when people start flooding in.

The solution of this problem is as simple as hilarious:

Genius Party Beyond – Moondrive

by Gunther Heinrich, 19 Aug 2009 in Anime Reviews

Take the average internet geek and you get something like this: Stupidity + Coolness – Money.

It’s hilarious that Moondrive – a short movie of the anime anthology Genius Party Beyond – accidentally exploits just this prototype to tell its hilarious story which follows a bunch of bankrupt thieves on their hunt for a treasure. Nevertheless I can safely state that Moondrive is one of the coolest things I have seen in a long time. This includes movies, by the way. It has tons of cool moments, interesting characters and style wherever you look. Admitted, the characters turn out to be a little bit flat but since this is a short movie that completely goes for “style” I can accept that. If you haven’t seen Moondrive or Genius Party Beyond, do it now. It’s only about twenty minutes long so you cannot say you ruined too much of your life afterwards.

So, and now let’s take a closer look at the best moments of Moondrive with an absolute disregard of spoilers (therefore the red flag on the left side of the title if you’re on this site and not using feed reader. This post was the reason I implemented all this technical AJAX stuff).

Google Squared: Goldfinger is not a Movie

by Gunther Heinrich, 5 Jun 2009 in Fun

What happens when you let an algorithm do the work a human can do much better albeit much slower? You get a big, fat *lol*.